#TheBeggsFoster Chapter One closed.

And just like that, he is gone.

Foster care is hard, y’all. You can imagine. I wouldn’t allow myself to think about how I would feel, until it was time. I wouldn’t allow myself to dabble there. I couldn’t. The pain is real, even when you cause it. We chose this particular path for him. He is where he should be. Hell, I think he is where he should stay. He is so happy. He is so loved. I see it in their face. I pray for them. I pray for him. 

Me? I’m okay. The boys? They are okay. Ramsey has asks about him all the time and so has Bear. He says “I miss him so much mama. I love him.” But he knows where he is and how this works. We are very open with the boys, as much as we can be. They understand how this goes, as much as their little brains will allow. 

Bj and I keep thinking, “we need to check on the babe” or we need to get him ready when heading out but he isn’t here any longer. We don’t have to make bottles, pack his bag for day care or wipe his nose. We don’t have to replace the sheet on his crib mattress any more. You know, the one that you see standing up right so every time I pass it, I don’t search for him. 

This is foster care, and we will jump right back in with both feet.

Thank you for reading, friend!
~Mika Beggs